It's been two months since I last sat down and wrote a blog post and I'm struggling to wrap my head around how quickly the time has gone. I know everyone's saying it but this year is absolutely flying by; it feels like only yesterday that we were celebrating the new year and getting excited for what 2020 had in store for us all. Ahh, how wrong we were - we're in August and, when you think about it, we've spent the majority of the year in corona land. It's definitely a far cry from where we thought we'd be at the start of the year.
But anyway, August means we're nearing the end of the summer and, quite frankly, I thought it was time for a bit of a life update post from yours truly - it has been a while, after all. I've tried to write this post probably nine or ten times within the last few days but I haven't really known how to get into it so we're just going to go for it and I guess the most obvious way to start is by addressing the elephant in the room... university.
If you've been a long time reader of my blog, you'll know that, for the last three years, I've been studying Journalism at the University of Westminster in London. You'll also probably know that it's been my aim to graduate with at least a 2:1 from the university... well, my grades got confirmed at the beginning of July and, following a really tough year - with a few months of remote craziness due to the coronavirus - I not only managed to achieve my goal, but I also managed to graduate with a First Class Honours degree in Journalism. And to say that I'm proud would be the understatement of the year. Uni, for me, was such a huge rollercoaster - there were some really amazing parts but also some really terrible low parts and I couldn't be happier to have ended that chapter of my life on such a high.
But, in terms of what's going on in my life now, there's not too much to report. I'm desperately seeking a job - I've never been one to sit around doing nothing, I get bored and would much rather be busy and productive but job seeking in this world of coronavirus and social distancing is proving to be, as expected, extremely difficult. I think this is probably the longest time I've gone without having a job since I was sixteen and I feel like I'm losing my mind. I love to work and it's really disheartening getting rejection emails on a pretty much daily basis but I'm not going to lose that positivity; we'll get there eventually, I've just got to keep pushing on and applying for everything I possibly can. I have true faith that it'll all work out in the end.
In terms of my personal life, I've found it super difficult to readjust to living back at home with my parents after finishing university. Lockdown was an interesting time because we were all pretty much living on top of each other, and there was a lot of tension and, even though life has kind of gone back to some form of 'normal', that tension hasn't necessarily gone away. It's a very tricky situation to manage but what's family life without a huge amount of ups and downs? I'm sure we'll get back to some of the ups soon... I'm so fed up of the arguments and negativity - it's draining!
My love life is non-existent and I'm actually really okay about that. I started the year with an anti-boys attitude; last year proved to be fairly dramatic and bought about some situations that were, on one hand, great but also really not ideal so I wanted to really focus on myself this year and, on the whole, I've done that. I'm of the opinion that if someone doesn't make the same effort with me as I do with them, or they're acting in a way that shows they either don't value what they have in me or don't respect me in the way I should be respected, then they are not worth it. I'm never going to be perfect and I don't see the point in forcing something with someone that doesn't appreciate me. So, for the foreseeable future, it's all about me and I'm so okay with that.
So yeah, I'm my priority at the moment. I'm applying for jobs left, right and centre (side note: if you know anyone hiring in the media industries, do let me know!), I'm spending time with the people that mean the most to me and generally focusing on myself and my self care. I've rewatched Gossip Girl. I've started watching New Girl (and I've become a little obsessed with it). I've spent a lot of time fixing my skincare routine. I've spent a lot of time creating my bedroom as my 'sanctuary', so to speak, and making that a comfortable space because, let's face it, lately I've spent a lot more time in it than in recent years. I've been trying to be healthier, I've been going for runs almost every day, I've tried to eat healthier (with a few exceptions, especially in the last couple of weeks), I've spent a lot more time outside wherever I can and I'm embracing that different side of myself. And I'm enjoying it a lot. But I do wish I had a job - again, I need that busy-ness and productivity in my life; I really do feel like that's where I thrive.
I'm determined to not lose this positivity, though. I will get a job and things will get better. I don't know when things will start to change but do stay tuned to find out.
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